- mom: you realize normal people don't have such strong feelings about the oxford comma
- me: THE OXFORD COMMA IS IMPORTANT
- mom: you realize this makes you a nerd
- me:
- mom:
- me: i had a party with the strippers, george bush and barack obama
- me: i had a party with the strippers, george bush, and barack obama
- me: without the comma, you are implying that george bush and barack obama are strippers
- mom:
- me:
- mom: this isn't normal
tell me how im supposed to breathe with no wifi
H O W ?!
Holy shit
I keep trying to think of a good comment for this but I’m speechless, really.
My god.
- one third of me: I want a boyfriend so much, relationships are so cute
- one third of me: sex sex sex I want sex fuck relationships lets be slutty lol
- one third of me: fuck everyone I hate people kill yourselves
Even though I’ve been on tumblr for quite sometime, I am still amazed at how fast people can get something from the television onto their blog. It’s like lightning.
via sodamnrelatable
(Source: probalicious)
can we all just take a minute to imagine steve rogers’ face the first time he heard someone say “motherfucker” casually
Costco is a great place to go if you want an unnecessary amount of an unnecessary item
My mom is yelling at my brother and I overheard this.
- Mom: GO TO YOUR ROOM
- Brother: That's not fair
- Mom: DO AS I SAY.
- Brother: You never send Lizzie to her room when she's in trouble!!
- Mom: Lizzie never leaves her room. If she were in trouble I'd make her sit in the living room or go outside or talk to human beings.
- ME: I CAN HEAR YOU.
